Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.
After a successful 20-year career in corporate business sales, I decided that I’d had enough of what had become a soul sucking job. Despite earning ‘good’ money, I’d become exhausted with life, physically, emotionally, psychologically and spiritually. I wasn’t even sure what I wanted from life anymore, I only knew that it needed change. I was also at this point of my life in my seventh year of Tramadol addiction.
Over the last 6 years I have been on somewhat of a journey of self-discovery, and following 10 weeks of Transactional Analysis therapy found myself studying counselling, psychology and mindfulness. I also began practising meditation to help overcome debilitating overthinking and anxiety.
During this time of change I found the space, courage and strength to finally kick my addiction, and do the one thing that had been missing from my life and that was take a long hard look inside myself, rather than look for solutions outside of me.
I have learnt much about myself and spent time healing the parts of me that deep down in my subconscious mind were driving my thoughts, behaviours and outcomes of my life in a negative way. My life only changed externally because of the changes I made internally.
Today my life is no longer stuck somewhere between regretting the past and being afraid of the future. ‘Feeling better’ came as a result of healing old pain and finding the strength to let go of the past, so I could create space for a better future. I have conditioned myself to live in the moment, to allow my reality to unfold itself daily, and to show up and meet it, however it arrives.
This means accepting the good and the bad as the duality of life, to stay grounded and emotionally balanced during difficult times and to allow myself to embrace moments of joy and celebrate the little successes of life that come my way.
I am passionate about trying to make the world a better place, to show up as the best version of myself to inspire others to do the same, to be a better father, partner and embrace all life has to offer with peace and kindness.
I am an advocate for men’s mental health and those suffering with addiction. I want to help people understand and overcome codependency so that they can finally free themselves from addiction and enjoy healthy interdependent relationships without the fear of being narcissistically abused.
I believe we should teach self-awareness and ‘mindfulness’ in schools, and that the education system needs a complete overhaul – too many young people are suffering with mental health problems, and not only is there insufficient resources in the NHS, but we also fail to give them the tools in which they can try and help themselves.
I choose a simple and minimalistic life and think we all have a shared responsibility towards each other the environment and humanity.
In my spare time I enjoy reading, writing, music, playing the guitar (very badly), meditation, camping, walking, psychology, philosophy, travelling, cooking, and gardening. I am a sucker for a sunset.
I now work as a Life Coach with young male adults aged 18-25 helping them transition into adulthood, understand and overcome codependent and addictive behaviours, embrace their own positive sense of masculine self, enjoy healthy relationships, develop psychological maturity and live life with more self-awareness, self accountability and emotional intelligence.